Conflict Resolution

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    Conflict Zen

  • Negotiation tips for tough economic times

    Tammy Lenski
    5 Nov 2009 | 7:09 am
    WMUR, New Hampshire’s ABC news affiliate, interviewed me for a feature negotiation tips story that aired earlier this week. We discussed ways to renegotiate rates on everything from credit cards to cable television, tips for negotiating a car purchase at a competitive price, and set the record straight on a few negotiation myths. Following the interview, I had a chance to coach someone for a few minutes and she then put my negotiation coaching immediately to work in a call to her cable company. Five minutes of coaching and almost $200 saved on her annual cable bill. Not bad. Here are…

  • Surviving and thriving during job loss and other major change

    Tammy Lenski
    23 Oct 2009 | 6:55 am
    Blame is oh so tempting, however. One of the things I’ve noticed that people do when some difficult change hits is to ask, “Why is this happening? It’s got to be someone’s fault.” We don’t want it to be ours, so we find someone else to pin it on: “Oh, it’s Mary’s fault, not mine, so I can feel a bit better about the fix we’re in.” It makes us feel more in control to have a why that’s not us. But finger-pointing has unintended consequences that are worth understanding. So notes change expert M.J. Ryan in her timely new…

  • The camel conundrum and the art of creative problem solving

    Tammy Lenski
    13 Oct 2009 | 10:36 am
    Jay Rothman, author of Resolving Identity-Based Conflict in Nations, Organizations, and Communities (Amazon link) tells this story: A Middle Eastern man died, leaving 17 camels to his three sons. The first son was to receive 1/2, the second son was to receive 1/3, and the third son was to receive 1/9. They were unable to figure out how to divide the camels fairly. After arguing among themselves, they consulted a wise old woman for a solution to this difficult problem. She offered to lend them her one camel. Of the now 18 camels, the first son took 9, the second took 6, and the third son took…

  • In workplace conflict, don’t mistake your experience for reality

    Tammy Lenski
    9 Oct 2009 | 9:09 am
    Overheard in the grocery shopping line at the end of a workday: Woman 1 to Woman 2: You wear red a lot, you know that? Woman 2: No, I don’t. Woman 1: Sure you do! Woman 2: No. I. Don’t. I only have two red suits and I only wear them every few weeks. Woman 1: Well, I must notice you wearing them on those days, I guess. I loved this conversation because I hear versions of it all the time – usually a tad more tense, though – in workplace mediations. Woman 1 made a classic perceptual mistake: She confused her experience of a person with the totality of that person (or in…

  • The argument clinic

    Tammy Lenski
    5 Oct 2009 | 6:56 pm
    Apparently Monty Python first aired 40 years ago today. In celebration, here’s a clip of their classic, The Argument Clinic: [Can't see the embedded video? Click here to view it on the web.] Happy laughter,
 
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    MSN: Conflict Resolution

  • Boston Scientific settles for $296m - Boston Globe

    7 Nov 2009 | 3:11 am
    Boston Scientific Corp. yesterday said it has agreed to pay $296 million to settle a US Department of Justice investigation into charges that its Guidant heart-device subsidiary made faulty product reports to the Food and Drug Administration. The ...

  • Team learns while helping nonprofits - Delaware Online

    7 Nov 2009 | 1:45 am
    Mary Nash Godden said she went "kicking and screaming" when her mother suggested she join an AmeriCorps' Public Allies Delaware program that pairs volunteers with nonprofit organizations. "I had finished college and really didn't know what to do ...

  • South Africa : UN Assembly Votes for Probes of Gaza War Charges - AllAfrica.com

    7 Nov 2009 | 1:30 am
    Pretoria — The UN General Assembly adopted a resolution to call upon both Israel and Palestine to conduct "independent and credible" investigations of the alleged war crimes during the 22-day Gaza conflict which broke out in December 2008. The ...

  • And the Giller goes to ... - Toronto Star

    7 Nov 2009 | 1:30 am
    The 2009 Giller prize nominees (clockwise from top left): Linden MacIntyre, Annabel Lyon, Colin McAdam, Kim Echlin and Anne Michaels. Of all the finalists, Lyon's novel is the most accomplished, sure, compelling and arrestingly its own. If the award ...

  • Baker University Signs with Central Texas College to Provide Four-year ... - YAHOO!

    7 Nov 2009 | 12:47 am
    Overland Park, KS (PRWEB) November 7, 2009 -- Dr. Patricia Long, President of Baker University, recently signed and approved an articulation agreement that will allow military personnel and their spouses who graduate from Central Texas College to ...
 
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    Resolving Conflict in Teams

  • Some Thoughts to Consider

    Guy Harris
    29 Oct 2009 | 6:57 pm
    I’m buried in some projects that I hope to be announcing in the next few weeks. These projects are keeping nearly all of my writing time occupied. I’ll have more information to share soon. In the meantime, here’s a great post by Tammy Lenski you might enjoy: In workplace conflict, don’t mistake your experience for reality

  • Conflict Can Be Good

    Guy Harris
    19 Oct 2009 | 4:44 pm
    While this blog is primarily about exploring thoughts, tips, techniques, and approaches for resolving conflict in teams, I thought it might be important to acknowledge that conflict can actually be a good thing in some situations. Good conflicts are the natural result of people working together towards a common cause. Well-intentioned, hard-working people can have honest [...]

  • Acknowledge Emotions Before Solving Problems

    Guy Harris
    5 Oct 2009 | 6:30 am
    Recently, I was working through an issue with another person. They were distressed over the results of a process that affects both of us. I helped to create the process. I have authority to change the process if necessary. And I have knowledge of the system to troubleshoot and fix a fair number of problems. As [...]

  • Patience Really Is a Virtue

    Guy Harris
    2 Oct 2009 | 7:46 am
    This week, I’ve been wrestling with various server and domain pointing issues related to this site. After nearly five days of working to get things settled, I think I’m almost there. I don’t think this blog or my business site ever went totally offline. (Although I did lose my email for about 3 or 4 [...]

  • The Power of Thank-you

    Guy Harris
    25 Sep 2009 | 8:22 am
    This morning I have been catching up on reading some of my favorite blogs. As always, I saw really thought provoking content by Tammy Lenski, Victoria Pynchon, Kevin Eikenberry, and Kare Anderson. The post that struck me the most was Common Courtesty Should Not Be An Oxymoron by Diane Levin. I’m not sure why it struck me [...]
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    Real Divorce Mediation

  • Divorce Tax Tip!

    Debra Synovec and Nancy Hudgins
    17 Oct 2009 | 1:55 pm
    The timing of your divorce could cut your taxes. Your tax bill could be significantly less or more, depending on your filing status as of December 31st. Many people think filing status for filing their income tax return is prorated for the year; it is not. Your tax “filing status”, single or married, is determined on the last day of the year. In other words, if you are divorced on the last day of the year, your status is single; if you are married at the end of the year, your status is married. Why is this important? Filing status determines your tax rate and how much you can take as a…

  • Divorce and the House

    Debra Synovec and Nancy Hudgins
    7 Oct 2009 | 1:49 pm
    Divorce is usually difficult.Emotions run high and at the same time divorcing couples have the added problem of figuring out the property distribution.This is particularly challenging when the market is down.Divorce clients I have seen in the past year have lost 15-30% of their home value, leaving the equity slim to none…or worse, negative.During a down market no one wants to sell their house, often times their largest asset; many divorcing couples are opting to keep joint ownership, hoping the market will turn so no one “sells” during a down market.What about the flip side?What happens…

  • Don't Get Lassoed!

    Debra Synovec and Nancy Hudgins
    23 Aug 2009 | 3:24 pm
    You are the best alternative to a litigated solution. Traditional litigation can make you feel like you have been hung out to dry.The traditional litigation model, used by most divorcing couples, “fuels and feeds off of overwrought emotions”, states Philip Mulford in Contemplating Divorce? Consider Mediation.Why is this? Divorce is not just a legal problem it is a family problem. Courts are not really set up for family problems. Using a judge to decide your case is like asking a rodeo rider to train a thoroughbred filly to run the Kentucky Derby. The rodeo rider is skilled at one set of…

  • Co-Parenting

    Nancy E. Hudgins
    17 Aug 2009 | 5:50 pm
    Our very own San Francisco Examiner published an article recently called “10 Commandments of Co-Parenting. You can read it, here.There is some great advice in this article, which is just as apt for parents who are together as well as for divorcing parents.The commandments are:1. Resolve conflicts without putting kids in the middle.2. Treat the other parent with respect.3. Observe appropriate boundaries.4. Communicate regularly with the other parent.5. Demonstrate positive conflict resolution.6. Share with your co-parent what you need from him or her to do a good job of parenting.7. Don’t…

  • Run Toward Fear

    Debra Synovec and Nancy Hudgins
    16 Aug 2009 | 4:33 pm
    People in the midst of divorce are often extremely overcome with fear caused by the overwhelming change in their life.Pressure from fear of the unknown, triggered by questions such as: “How will the divorce affect the children?” “How will I survive financially?” “What will people think?”“Where will I live?”, coupled by anger and raw emotions, drives people to run away, looking for a place to “solve” the questions and expunge the fear.In their flight, divorcing clients regularly run to attorneys, hoping to be saved by the courts, only to find out that the situation then…
 
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    Brains On Purpose™

  • Applications being accepted for Penn's annual Neuroscience Boot Camp

    StephanieWestAllen
    6 Nov 2009 | 9:22 am
    Want to learn more about neuroscience? This event being held August 1 through 11, 2010, may be a good fit for you. What's Neuroscience Boot Camp? From the Web site: Neuroscience is increasingly relevant to a number of professions and academic disciplines beyond its traditional medical applications. Lawyers, educators, economists and businesspeople, as well as scholars of sociology, philosophy, applied...

  • Hear an interview of the author of BUDDHA'S BRAIN tomorrow

    StephanieWestAllen
    3 Nov 2009 | 7:54 am
    Buddha's Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom is a book I have been reading, enjoying, and recommending to colleagues. This morning the book came to my attention twice (in addition to seeing it on my nightstand). A recommendation of the book came over a listserv for scholarly discussion of mindfulness, and I see that the author Rick...

  • Some short podcasts from the 2009 NeuroLeadership Summit at UCLA

    StephanieWestAllen
    1 Nov 2009 | 1:31 pm
    I got back late this week from the NeuroLeadership Summit with a strong need for a nap. The days were long and the presentations many. I hope to blog about some of the programs soon. Originally I had planned to blog in the evenings while there. Instead, soon after I returned to my room, I curled up in bed with...

  • Scent of fairness in the air? Mediation running hot or cold? The importance of subtle environmental cues

    StephanieWestAllen
    25 Oct 2009 | 2:17 pm
    Not only do the people in the room affect the outcome of a mediation, but the room itself may, too. How much attention do you pay to the little things in the conflict resolution setting? Let's look at some recent experiments that just might increase that attention. One factor in the environment that may have an influence is smell. Research...

  • Next week watch for posts from the NeuroLeadership Summit

    StephanieWestAllen
    23 Oct 2009 | 1:49 pm
    I will be attending the NeuroLeadership Summit next week at UCLA. The list of scheduled speakers is excellent and includes Marco Iacoboni, Daniel Siegel, Matthew Lieberman, Jonah Lehrer, Yi-Yuan Tang, and Jeffrey Schwartz, all of whom I have blogged about at least once either here or at idealawg. Take a look at the program [pdf] and you will see why...
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    Freak Revolution

  • OMG Wedding

    Kyeli
    6 Nov 2009 | 6:30 am
    Pace and I are having a big old-fashioned wedding ceremony tomorrow. Tomorrow! Since yesterday, friends and family galore have been flying in and driving in and generally showing up to be part of our 6-day Wedding Extravaganza. We have 100 people, all told, loved ones from near and far. If you couldn’t make it (or didn’t get an invite) – no worries! Megan will be live-blogging it, so keep hitting refresh on our blog during the wedding (starting at 2:12pm Central on Saturday) to virtually be here with us. We wanted to invite every single one of you to be here in person, but…

  • “The Body Sacred” – part two: My Sacred Body

    Kyeli
    4 Nov 2009 | 6:30 am
    Overwhelmingly touched by all the responses, on the blog, on twitter, in private, to my post about my body. So full, my heart overflows with love and compassion for so many of us that have been hurt and scarred and molded by the shoulds and supposed-to-bes. I have been living in this skin for nearly 33 years, and I have never really looked at myself. Too fat, too scared, too ugly, too afraid of what I’d find. Yesterday, I did. I stopped hiding from myself. I took out my mirror and my camera and photographed the miracle I call home, this body I find myself growing to know – and…

  • 2009

    Pace
    2 Nov 2009 | 6:30 am
    In keeping with my annual tradition, this Samhain Eve I’m reflecting on everything that’s happened this year. (I wrote this on the 31st but scheduled it to delay posting until the following Monday.) Samhain is the end of the old year and the beginning of the new; a perfect time for reflection and introspection. This post is different from all the other posts in our blog; it’s a glimpse into the whole of our year, not just the bloggy or businessy bits. I don’t give a lot of context here, so feel free to ask if you wish. In November, in fact through all of November, December, and…

  • Community Update #9: October Manifesto Famousness and “Heal the World” 11×17 prints

    Pace
    30 Oct 2009 | 7:30 am
    As promised, here are the highlights of how the Freak Revolution Manifesto has changed the world in October! Moon’sLark shared a very touching story of how the manifesto is affecting her. Diary of a Bad Housewife has a post about the manifesto in the form of a long letter to a friend. Pace had a conversation with Karl of paradox1x, and it turned out that Karl’s opinion of the manifesto was totally different after reading it thoroughly than when he first skimmed it. The manifesto also made guest appearances on Lily of the Valley, Thanks For Playing, and Odd Angel, and you guys have…

  • “The Body Sacred” – part one: the body stuff

    Kyeli
    28 Oct 2009 | 7:30 am
    I need a break from all the death-talk, so let’s talk about some of the other things on my mind for a while. Surprisingly, it’s not weddingweddingwedding or even IrelandIrelandIreland in here – yet. I’m sure I’ll get there. Probably soon. So, I’ve been reading “The Body Sacred” by Dianne Sylvan. By page 4, I was nodding enthusiastically. Page 8 had me crying, and by page 12, I was wondering how I can meet this extraordinary woman and be her friend. It’s a good book. I highly recommend it. I’m still only on page 50, because it’s…
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    Mediation marketing and career guide: Making mediation your day job

  • How not to use powerpoint in your mediation marketing

    Tammy Lenski
    6 Nov 2009 | 2:57 am
    When a prospective client invites me to speak to their group about my work and how I may be of assistance, one of the first logistical questions I’m asked is whether or not I want an LCD projector. There are times I do use PowerPoint, but I’m judicious about it and always keep Garr Reynolds’ wisdom in my mind. And the following tongue-in-cheek wisdom, too. It’s an oldie but goodie. Enjoy the chuckle! [Can't view the embedded video in your email? Click here to view it online.] Making Mediation Your Day Job by Tammy Lenski is licensed under a Creative Commons…

  • Welcome, association of missouri mediators

    Tammy Lenski
    31 Oct 2009 | 8:30 am
    Today was a first for me: Keynoting an ADR association conference via Skype. If you were in the Association of Missouri Mediators audience, thanks for inviting me and for being part of something new and interesting! I promised the audience some follow-up links based on our conversation about marketing mediation, and thought I’d share them with everyone. Articles related to my keynote comments Marketing mediation from your strengths How a narrow target audience broadens chances for success Mediation in the mainstream: 5 successful strategies for spreading innovation Your ADR marketing…

  • Top web 2.0 tools for ADR professionals

    Tammy Lenski
    30 Oct 2009 | 11:00 am
    This post is written to supplement comments I’m making today during the Online Dispute Resolution Cyberweek panel hosted by Jeff Thompson and including me, Diane Levin, Victoria Pynchon and John Ford. In my remarks I promised to post links to the applications I recommend for using social media effectively. Twitter and Facebook Applications These applications help you participate in Twitter and/or Facebook from an application on your desktop or iPhone, and, particularly in the case of Twitter, make using the site far easier. Seesmic – one app for using both Twitter and Facebook…

  • Giving away 3 invites to Google Voice

    Tammy Lenski
    27 Oct 2009 | 2:21 am
    I have three invites to give away to fellow mediators for a free Google Voice account. If you’re new to my blog and aren’t yet familiar with Google Voice, check out my past article Super-charge mediation client customer service with Google Voice. And since that article, Google has announced that you don’t need a new number to use GV; you can use your existing mobile (but not landline) number if you wish. Here’s the announcement with the details: Google Voice with your existing number. Want one of the three invites? Leave a comment on the blog (click here if…

  • 5 top ADR business uses for Twitter

    Tammy Lenski
    27 Oct 2009 | 2:01 am
    A reader wrote to ask me, How do you most use Twitter? I use it to keep up with friends, colleagues and acquaintances. I use it to discover cool new things in the world. And I use it to help my business. I try to strike a fair balance between the three uses because I don’t want to become overly promotional and I value the connection that comes with letting people know who I am and not just what I do. When I open Twitter via an app on my Mac or my iPhone, and I’ve got business on my mind, I think this way: Use Twitter to find the people who care about your message. Silicon Valley…
 
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    Program in Conflict Studies and Dispute Resolution UNCG

  • UNCG Conflict Studies and North Carolinians storm ACR

    13 Oct 2009 | 1:11 pm
    Students and faculty from UNCG's Program in Conflict Studies and Dispute Resolution and conflict professionals from all over North Carolina attended the Association for Conflict Resolution (ACR) national conference in Atlanta in force this year. Nine students from both the residential and on-line programs attended and faculty made 5 presentations. At least six other conflict professionals from North Carolina were spotted during the conference, but many more "sightings" were reported.During the conference, Rev. Nelson and Mrs. Joyce Johnson from Greensboro were honored with the Diversity and…

  • Interesting articles on making a living as a conflict professional

    4 Jun 2009 | 4:15 pm
    Here is an original article and a book review of Bernard Mayer's new book "Staying with Conflict", both dealing with being a "conflict professional" and trying to make a living. Interesting stuff!http://www.mediate.com/articles/Velikonja1.cfmhttp://www.mediate.com/articles/frankelschauJ7.cfm?nl=214

  • Graduation 2009

    18 May 2009 | 12:04 pm
    The Conflict Resolution Program held its spring graduation ceremony on Saturday May 16th at 11:00 AM at Gateway University Research Park in Brown Summit. Some 45 family, members, and friends were on-hand to support graduates. Dr. Witty offered some remarks and words of wisdom for the graduating students and their families and Dr. Hayes and Dr. Matyok presented several awards to students who distinguished themselves in their graduate work. Dr. Witty also shared that the program will officially change its name to the Program in Conflict Studies and Dispute Resolution, effective June 1,…

  • Leadership Education Workshop Series

    18 Mar 2009 | 12:53 pm
    The University of North Carolina at Greensboro Conflict Resolution Program Presents its: Leadership Education Workshop Series Negotiation: Skills and Strategies and Workplace Mediation: Strategies and Techniques When:17 April – 19 April 2009 Where:Greensboro Chamber-of-Commerce, 342 N. Elm St. Greensboro, NC Facilitator/Trainer: Dr. Neil Katz currently serves as Director of Training and Organizational Development for the nationally renowned, number one rated Executive Education Programs at the Maxwell School of Citizenship and Public Affairs at Syracuse University. In addition, throughout…

  • Mediation: Still a great career

    12 Feb 2009 | 11:56 am
    Considering a career change in economic times? Then getting a degree in Conflict Resolution and pursuing a career as a mediator may be a good choice according to US News and World Report. For more information, read the article below.http://www.usnews.com/articles/business/best-careers/2008/12/11/best-careers-2009-mediator.html
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    conflict-resolution « WordPress.com Tag Feed

  • Good News About Your Strong-Willed Child: Raising the Healthy Individual (6/10)

    Arizona's Optimist
    7 Nov 2009 | 2:15 am
    Which types of parents raised you — the overprotective Rescuer who assumes too much responsibility, or the Reactor; critical, under-involved, and the distant? Child psychologist, Dr. Randy Reynolds states, “Both Rescuers and Reactors present strategies for failed parenting.”  No wonder I’m screwed!  My mother was a Rescuer, my father, a Reactor.  I was raised by both! So how did I learn (and continue to learn) what my parents failed to teach me?  SOCIETY — the school of hard knocks! I want more for my two sons — way more.  I want my husband and I to…

  • Need to control your anger? Try SPAM

    debbiedunn
    5 Nov 2009 | 7:20 am
    Are you having trouble controlling your feelings of anger? You might wish to try a method of Anger Management that works called SPAM, like the meat, only it is not something to eat. (S.P.A.M. = Stop-Ponder-Appreciate-Moment) Click on Conflict Resolution to read the entire tale.

  • Dealing With Conflict

    Arron
    4 Nov 2009 | 1:14 pm
    I never have to deal with conflict, but I know people who do on a regular basis.  Here are some practical things we can do to work through conflict productively. 1) Get all the facts: What went wrong…not who is to blame. 2) Stay calm: find solution together….don’t permit emotion to take over reason. You may feel like smashing a chair over someone’s head–and it may feel good at the time–but that’s not really a productive tool for conflict management. 3) Criticize in private: Listen if you want to be heard.  Disagree without being disagreeable. 4)…

  • Why, Mr. Anderson, why, why do you persist?

    aliersenerol
    4 Nov 2009 | 7:02 am
    “Why, Mr. Anderson? Why do you do it? Why get up? Why keep fighting? Do you believe you’re fighting for something? For more than your survival? Can you tell me what it is? Do you even know? Is it freedom? Or truth? Perhaps peace? Yes? No? Could it be for love? Illusions, Mr. Anderson. Vagaries of perception. The temporary constructs of a feeble human intellect trying desperately to justify an existence that is without meaning or purpose. And all of them as artificial as the Matrix itself, although only a human mind could invent something as insipid as love. You must be able to see…

  • Conflict Resolution 101: How to teach conflict resolution

    debbiedunn
    4 Nov 2009 | 6:45 am
    Teaching conflict resolution works best, with elementary school students and middle school students, by combining it with the concepts of communication skills and character education strategies. Click on Conflict Resolution to read the entire article.
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    Real Divorce Mediation

  • Divorce Tax Tip!

    17 Oct 2009 | 1:55 pm
    The timing of your divorce could cut your taxes. Your tax bill could be significantly less or more, depending on your filing status as of December 31st. Many people think filing status for filing their income tax return is prorated for the year; it is not. Your tax “filing status”, single or married, is determined on the last day of the year. In other words, if you are divorced on the last day of the year, your status is single; if you are married at the end of the year, your status is married. Why is this important? Filing status determines your tax rate and how much you can take as a…

  • Divorce and the House

    7 Oct 2009 | 1:49 pm
    Divorce is usually difficult.Emotions run high and at the same time divorcing couples have the added problem of figuring out the property distribution.This is particularly challenging when the market is down.Divorce clients I have seen in the past year have lost 15-30% of their home value, leaving the equity slim to none…or worse, negative.During a down market no one wants to sell their house, often times their largest asset; many divorcing couples are opting to keep joint ownership, hoping the market will turn so no one “sells” during a down market.What about the flip side?What happens…

  • Don't Get Lassoed!

    23 Aug 2009 | 3:24 pm
    You are the best alternative to a litigated solution. Traditional litigation can make you feel like you have been hung out to dry.The traditional litigation model, used by most divorcing couples, “fuels and feeds off of overwrought emotions”, states Philip Mulford in Contemplating Divorce? Consider Mediation.Why is this? Divorce is not just a legal problem it is a family problem. Courts are not really set up for family problems. Using a judge to decide your case is like asking a rodeo rider to train a thoroughbred filly to run the Kentucky Derby. The rodeo rider is skilled at one set of…

  • Co-Parenting

    17 Aug 2009 | 5:50 pm
    Our very own San Francisco Examiner published an article recently called “10 Commandments of Co-Parenting. You can read it, here.There is some great advice in this article, which is just as apt for parents who are together as well as for divorcing parents.The commandments are:1. Resolve conflicts without putting kids in the middle.2. Treat the other parent with respect.3. Observe appropriate boundaries.4. Communicate regularly with the other parent.5. Demonstrate positive conflict resolution.6. Share with your co-parent what you need from him or her to do a good job of parenting.7. Don’t…

  • Run Toward Fear

    16 Aug 2009 | 4:33 pm
    People in the midst of divorce are often extremely overcome with fear caused by the overwhelming change in their life.Pressure from fear of the unknown, triggered by questions such as: “How will the divorce affect the children?” “How will I survive financially?” “What will people think?”“Where will I live?”, coupled by anger and raw emotions, drives people to run away, looking for a place to “solve” the questions and expunge the fear.In their flight, divorcing clients regularly run to attorneys, hoping to be saved by the courts, only to find out that the situation then…
 
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    ANGER ON MY MIND

  • Affordable Online Anger Management Classes

    Carlos R. Todd
    29 Oct 2009 | 3:52 pm
    For anger management classes in North Carolina visit www.masteringanger.com or call 704-804-0841.

  • How to Be Positive

    Carlos R. Todd
    29 Oct 2009 | 3:48 pm
    Think of 10 things that you like about yourself and put them on post it notes. Put the notes in places around the house and bathroom so that you see them in the morning when you get up.  These will be your affirmations for the day. Repeat them to yourself on a daily basis.  Again, if you don’t believe in the good about yourself, you will not have much luck in convincing others about it. Start believing in yourself and give yourself positive self talk and eliminate the negative.  Each time you say something negative to yourself or about yourself, stop. This is not…

  • Anger management classes online $99

    Carlos R. Todd
    21 Oct 2009 | 5:04 pm
    For anger management classes online Click Here. For answers to your questions please call 704-804-0841.

  • Understanding your beliefs and values—respecting the beliefs of others

    Carlos R. Todd
    21 Oct 2009 | 5:00 pm
    Your beliefs and values are what make you a unique individual. They are based upon past experiences as well as present circumstances. Many of them were learned from parents as well as other respected individuals. While some people may have values and beliefs that are deemed to be “wrong” according to society, unless your values and beliefs cause harm to others, they cannot be considered wrong. There is no such thing as the right way to think. In order for you to be able to resolve your conflicts and grow as an individual, you must be able to understand your beliefs and values.

  • Online Anger Management Classes

    Carlos R. Todd
    14 Oct 2009 | 3:16 pm
    For affordable anger management nationwide Click Here
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    Colin Rule's blog

  • Voting with the remote

    Colin Rule
    20 Oct 2009 | 9:59 am
    Jacob Weisberg in Newsweek: "Any news organization that took its responsibilities seriously would take pains to cover presidential criticism fairly. It would regard doing so as itself a test of integrity. At Fox, by contrast, complaints of unfairness prompt only hoots of derision and demands for "evidence" that, when presented, is brushed off and ignored... Fox's model has invaded the bloodstream of the American media. By showing that ideologically distorted news can drive ratings, Ailes has provoked his rivals at CNN and MSNBC to develop a variety of populist and ideological takes on the…

  • Don't Blow It

    Colin Rule
    18 Oct 2009 | 6:15 pm
    Bono in the NYT today: "The Nobel Peace Prize is the rest of the world saying, “Don’t blow it.” But that’s not just directed at Mr. Obama. It’s directed at all of us. What the president promised was a “global plan,” not an American plan. The same is true on all the other issues that the Nobel committee cited, from nuclear disarmament to climate change — none of these things will yield to unilateral approaches. They’ll take international cooperation and American leadership. The president has set himself, and the rest of us, no small task. That’s why America shouldn’t turn…

  • Dealing with FOX News as a political enemy

    Colin Rule
    16 Oct 2009 | 9:18 am
    Gene Lyons on Salon: "Appearing on CNN’s “Reliable Sources,” the White House’s Dunn made it clear that the Obama administration intends to deal with the network as a political enemy. “We’re going to treat them the way we would treat an opponent,” she subsequently told The New York Times. “As they are undertaking a war against Barack Obama and the White House, we don’t need to pretend that this is the way that legitimate news organizations behave.” {...} Providentially, the Obama administration appears to grasp that Rupert Murdoch’s minions may inadvertently have done…

  • Happiness and healthiness are contagious

    Colin Rule
    29 Sep 2009 | 5:22 pm
    One of the more interesting results of the Framingham Heart Study: happiness and healthiness are contagious: "two years ago, a pair of social scientists named Nicholas Christakis and James Fowler used the information collected over the years about Joseph and Eileen and several thousand of their neighbors to make an entirely different kind of discovery. By analyzing the Framingham data, Christakis and Fowler say, they have for the first time found some solid basis for a potentially powerful theory in epidemiology: that good behaviors — like quitting smoking or staying slender or being happy…

  • red-blue dialogue on health care part n+3

    Colin Rule
    25 Sep 2009 | 9:53 pm
    Read Don's latest post here. I thought in my last post we were making some progress in this discussion, but it seems we've backslid to talking points and exaggerations. So now I'm feeling much less optimistic that we'll be able to achieve even the most basic level of mutual understanding as a result of this exchange. Don said: "I don't know how a reasonable person can look at the proposed legislation and describe it as "modest" or "proscribed and constrained". If a program spending $1.6 trillion over ten years can now be described as modest, the word has surely been redefined when I was not…
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    Global Conflict Resolution and Mediation Discussion

  • HUMAN RIGHTS: PRIVACY AND THE ENVIRONMENT

    Often practitioners say I believe in human rights and a fundamental question seems to arise which right are they advocates of? What are the objects and purposes of this right? What source is it derived from the constitution, treaty law or another legal instrument? Key rights that are mentioned in this posting are privacy and environmental [...]

  • Sovereignty Abandoned: Bernard Kouchner’s Assault on the Westphalia Doctrine

    Abstract This short article is designed to look at the long term implications of the French Foreign Minister’s suggestion of sending offensive humanitarian aid into the cyclone ravaged areas of Burma. The dangers suggested herein are not the immediate effects of the humanitarian invasion of Burma, but an analysis of the precedent set by such action.  [...]

  • TEN SIMPLE RULES FOR ATTORNEYS TO GET THE MOST OUT OF FAMILY MEDIATION

    8 Susan M. Helms 2003, 2009 1. ADVISE THE MEDIATOR IN ADVANCE about: domestic violence, the need to end the session early, health issues of either party, inability to pay the expected fee, desperate need for coffee and doughnuts or smoke breaks, etc. 2. COME WITH FACTS AND FIGURES. If you have not yet completed a financial [...]

  • Real Estate Negotiation: Best Strategies

    An important part of the job of your Realtor is to help you negotiate for the best deal on a house. You must be able to rely on their confidence and professionalism in this area. Here are some strategies to guide your real estate negotiation and achieve the best result for you. There is no [...]

  • ALTERNATIVE DISPUTE RESOLUTION (ADR) FOR LESS COST AND RISK

    If you find yourself considering litigation to resolve a dispute, consider a couple of points: · First, greater than 80 percent of all civil cases in most jurisdictions, and greater than 95 percent in many, settle at or before trial (from Beyond Winning:  Negotiating to Create Value in Deals and Disputes by Mnookin, Peppet and Tulumello). · [...]
 
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    ICT for Peacebuilding (ICT4Peace)

  • 1000 posts on Groundviews: Bearing witness, shaping peace

    Sanjana Hattotuwa
    6 Nov 2009 | 3:07 am
    Exactly three years after its launch, Groundviews published its 1000th post today. In it Dr. Paikiasothy Saravanamuttu identifies the site with quality debate and asks citizens to use it to canvass their ideas for constitutional reform, governance, human rights and the economy and whatever else they see as constituting essential elements of an agenda for change and reform. Over three years, Groundviews has borne witness to that which traditional print and electronic media did not, and for well-known reasons, could not. Post-war for example, our path-breaking coverage of the situation…

  • White House visitor logs and e-gov

    Sanjana Hattotuwa
    2 Nov 2009 | 6:29 am
    The White House website has an interesting post on new disclosure policies that make available on the web, for the first time in history, all White House visitor records. Transparency like you’ve never seen before is a progressive record of transparency made possible by a forward thinking administration, strengthening and complementing existing Right to Information legislation. Compare this with Sri Lanka’s proposed use of ICT at local and national government levels and lack of any Right to Information legislation. Posted in ICTs and other stuff

  • Mobiles, new media and citizen journalism in Kashmir

    Sanjana Hattotuwa
    1 Nov 2009 | 11:44 pm
    Photo credit: BBC World Service Kashmir has, according to a new BBC World Service documentary, the highest rate of mobile phone usage per capita in India although services were only introduced in 2003. As the BBC reporter points out, without mobile phone services there would be no cyber resistance. And there’s the irony, for it is this largely mobile phone based cyber resistance that is today documenting human rights abuses in the region, and serving to bolster international attention on a region that is tremendously difficult and dangerous for traditional news media to cover in a…

  • The Hub poses vital questions over controversial execution video

    Sanjana Hattotuwa
    1 Nov 2009 | 6:27 am
    Should You Believe Your Eyes? Allegations of Doctored Video from Sri Lanka is a good post on The Hub, analysing the reactions to the controversial video first broadcast by Channel 4. Well over 14,000 people have to read read a related post on Groundviews (A video of shame and outrage: Responses, positions and clarifications) looking at the reactions to this video from government, civil society, media, the international community, diaspora and others. Despite concerns over the authenticity of the video by government, the Sunday Leader reported recently that “a United States company…

  • Blogger arrested in Sri Lanka for “offensive” comments regarding President and Defense Secretary?

    Sanjana Hattotuwa
    1 Nov 2009 | 4:41 am
    The Daily Mirror web edition carries a story about a youth arrested by the Criminal Investigations Department and remanded till the 6th of November by the Matale Magistrate. The crime? Making “offensive” comments regarding the President and the Secretary of Defense on the web. The newspaper has no further information on the individual, the nature of the “offensive” comments, or the language and location in which they were published. The disturbing transition from banning pornography to open web censorship seems to have been made. Update: 2nd November 2009 The Daily…
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    NCDD News & Perspectives

  • IJP2 Article on Framing and Systems Challenges

    Sandy Heierbacher
    5 Nov 2009 | 11:50 am
    An article of mine was published in the latest addition of the International Journal of Public Participation (IJP2), titled Taking our Work to the Next Level: Addressing Challenges Facing the Dialogue and Deliberation Community.  The article outlines our learnings in two of the five challenges we focused on at the 2008 NCDD conference in Austin:  The “Framing Challenge” (How can we talk about and present D&D work in ways that are accessible to a broader audience?) and the “Systems Challenge” (How can we make D&D values and practices integral to government,…

  • Open Government: Strategies and Tactics from the Play Book

    Sandy Heierbacher
    4 Nov 2009 | 2:45 pm
    Lucas Cioffi sent the following announcement to the NCDD Discussion list today. The lead organizers of the event are 3 NCDD members: Lucas Cioffi (AthenaBridge), Stephen Buckley (UStransparency.com), and Kaliya Hamlin (Unconferences.net). To the Open Government Community, You are invited to Open Government: Strategies and Tactics from the Play Book. This will be the first in a series around the Open Government Directive and specifically designed to create a community of support for implementation. Who: Those who are blazing the trail of open government– this first event is for pioneers…

  • National Town Hall on Adults with Autism Coming Up

    Sandy Heierbacher
    2 Nov 2009 | 9:37 am
    I received an email Friday from Dianna Dauber at AmericaSpeaks about their upcoming Advancing Futures of Adults with Autism (AFAA) National Town Hall on November 13th. Dianna told me they’re still recruiting participants for the Chicago site (the Hub) and for the online virtual town meeting site. I don’t believe they’re in need of facilitators at this point. If you want to experience some innovative online dialogue and you are concerned about autism-related issues, you may want to register as a participant in the “Virtual Town Hall.” In the Virtual Town Hall,…

  • Report on Online Town Hall Meetings from the Congressional Management Foundation

    Sandy Heierbacher
    1 Nov 2009 | 3:52 pm
    Be sure to check out Online Town Hall Meetings: Exploring Democracy in the 21st Century (2009, Congressional Management Foundation), which tackles the lack of information out there about how the internet might facilitate and enable conversations between citizens and Members of Congress. The report is based on 20 online town hall meetings facilitated in 2006 with U.S. Representatives and one event in 2008 with a U.S. Senator, with a total number of participants in excess of 600. The “online town halls” were not remarkable process-wise; the Member of Congress and moderator spoke…

  • Notes from yesterday’s White House meeting on open gov’t dialogue evaluation

    Sandy Heierbacher
    29 Oct 2009 | 1:29 pm
    As many of you know, a survey was conducted in August by AmericaSpeaks, the League of Women Voters, the National Coalition on Dialogue and Deliberation (NCDD), OMB Watch and OpentheGovernment.org, to assess the public experience of participating in the White House’s 3-phase online dialogue process feeding into the forthcoming Open Government Directive (OGD). Yesterday, I and eight others from our group met with six white house officials to (1) discuss our findings, (2) to get a sense of how the White House plans to evaluate future online consultations, and (3) to discuss how the open…
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    Notes from the World of Anger Management

  • Aftercare For “disruptive physicians” is a Critical Factor in Successful Intervention

    George Anderson
    6 Nov 2009 | 3:38 pm
    Aftercare has been routinely mandated for psychiatric impairment, substance abuse and boundary issues for physician clients. The Vanderbilt and University of California Medical School Programs for “disruptive physicians” also include aftercare. Aftercare helps the participant increase his or her ability to maintain the initial gains made in the program and continue to enhance the skills in which the participant scored in the deficit range during the assessment. During the last several years, Anderson & Anderson has offered free aftercare to some of the physicians who completed the…

  • Anger Management for Developmentally Disabled Adults and Youth

    George Anderson
    2 Nov 2009 | 5:34 pm
    A developmental disability is a disability that is manifested before the person reaches 22 years of age, which constitutes a substantial disability to the affected individual, and is attributable to mental retardation or related conditions which include cerebral palsy, epilepsy, autism or other neurological conditions when such conditions result in impairment of general intellectual functioning or adaptive behavior similar to that of a person with mental retardation. Adaptive behavior means that the person has overall adaptive behavior which is significantly limited in two or more skill areas…

  • The Joint Commission’s “Disruptive Physician” Standards Spawn a Cottage Industry of Questionable Providers

    George Anderson
    31 Oct 2009 | 10:07 am
    Effective January 1, 2009, JCAHO issued new guidelines to respond to the negative behavior of physicians that often places patient care at risk while increasing medical errors. These new standards make it mandatory for Hospitals to establish written policies designed to address what is defined as “disruptive physician behavior”. Essentially, a “disruptive physician” is one whose behavior is described as demeaning, aggressive, uncivil, or hostile to colleagues, patients or ancillary staff. The American Medical Association (AMA) has defined disruptive behavior as a style…

  • Anger Management Guru Exposes Fraudulent “Rageaholics” Treatment Program

    George Anderson
    29 Oct 2009 | 4:07 pm
    Substance Abuse Programs have deemed themselves “instant experts” on delivering intervention services for disruptive physicians. Their strategy for capitalizing on the niche market created by the Joint Commission on The Accreditation of Health Care Organizations’ (JCAHO) newly enacted policy requiring intervention for “disruptive physicians” is to label these physicians as “rageaholics” in need of Inpatient substance abuse treatment. Not only is this fictitious condition completely absent from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental and…

  • Drug Rehab Programs Becoming Instant Experts on “disruptive physician behavior”

    George Anderson
    28 Oct 2009 | 8:54 am
    On January 1, 2009, the Joint Commission on The Accreditation of Health Care Organizations implemented its new policy on “disruptive physicians”. This policy mandates intervention for physicians whose behavior at work is demeaning, condescending, aggressive, arrogant or indicative of a need for anger management/emotional intelligence. In the absence of intervention standards for this new category (disruptive physicians), a cottage industry including inpatient drug rehab programs have suddenly sprung up to provide treatment/intervention for unsuspecting physicians who are mandated to seek…
 
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    Peacemakers

  • Key Policy Institutions and Think Tanks in Peacebuilding

    story spotted by Catherine Morris
    6 Nov 2009 | 6:56 pm
    Over the past two decades, many new institutions from governments, foundations and nonprofits have emerged that provide in-depth policy analysis of current conflicts and the effectiveness of existing responses. In order to stay up to date on current crises, success stories in preventing, managing and transforming conflicts, and larger policy lessons for the field, reading reports from many of these institutions is indispensable. While it is not possible to provide a complete list of all these institutions in the world, I wanted to start off by providing a list of some the key institutions out…

  • African Peace-building Agenda: “Elements of a New Strategy to Disarm the LRA”

    story spotted by Catherine Morris
    6 Nov 2009 | 6:38 pm
    Last month, during the Great Lakes Contact Group meeting in Washington, the US government confirmed they had received a new shopping list of requests from the Ugandan government to help them hunt down the Lord’s Resistance Army (LRA). US military support to find an end to Joseph Kony’s murderous insurgency is definitely necessary. But supporting ill-conceived and poorly implemented Ugandan military operations in helpless countries of the region is not the solution.

  • MSF vaccination used as bait in unacceptable attack on civilians

    story spotted by Catherine Morris
    6 Nov 2009 | 6:12 pm
    Kinshasa – Seven Medecins Sans Frontieres (MSF) vaccination sites, where thousands of civilians had gathered, came under fire during attacks by the Congolese army against the Forces Democratiques de Liberation du Rwanda (FDLR) in North Kivu, Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC)… MSF launched a mass vaccination campaign in Masisi district to support the Ministry of Health in response to a measles epidemic. On October 17, MSF medical teams were vaccinating thousands of children in seven different sites in Ngomashi and Kimua zones, controlled by the FDLR at the time. All parties to the…

  • World court to investigate Kenya violence

    story spotted by Catherine Morris
    6 Nov 2009 | 6:11 pm
    NAIROBI, Kenya – Members of the political elite in Kenya, a nation where top leaders have long escaped prosecution for corruption and other crimes, could now face an international investigation into the violence that shook the country after disputed elections last year.

  • Zambia: Media Can Be Dangerous Tool

    story spotted by Catherine Morris
    6 Nov 2009 | 6:08 pm
    PARLIAMENT yesterday heard that the media can be a dangerous tool if placed in the hands of non-professionals, especially during election time when political tension is high. Chairperson of the committee on information and Broadcasting Services Mwansa Kapeya said this when he presented a motion to adopt the committee’s report. Mr Kapeya, who is PF Mpika Central MP said professionalism was the safeguard for the media and that politicians should not use it to fan violence.
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    Re:solutions

  • Happy Conflict Resolution Day

    15 Oct 2009 | 8:57 am
    To all: Happy Conflict Resolution Day!Please take a moment to reflect upon, and promote, the use of resolving conflicts in the legal system, businesses, schools, families, and communities.

  • Words from George Mitchell

    24 Sep 2009 | 10:41 am
    George Mitchell is the current Special Envoy for Middle East Peace. Very recently, he briefed reporters about the trilateral meeting President Obama had with Prime Minister Netanyahu of Israel and President Abbas of the Palestinian Authority. The transcript of Mr. Mitchell's briefing can be found here. Mr. Mitchell made some interesting comments about conflict resolution--regardless of one's view of the situation between Israel and the Palestinian Authority--and I'd like your comments.The tone was positive and determined. The President made clear his commitment to moving forward, and the…

  • Conflict Resolution Day Approaches

    24 Sep 2009 | 10:30 am
    October 15 is Conflict Resolution Day, sponsored by an organization that I belong to and respect, the Association for Conflict Resolution. As Conflict Resolution Day approaches, a number of local ACR Chapters begin publicizing the day as well as local governmental units and agencies.Here's the first article that I've come across, it's from the Maryland Gazette, announcing that Maryland's Judiciary's Mediation and Conflict Resolution Office is sponsoring a Conflict Resolution Day Student Bookmark Art Contest.Congratulations to the Maryland Judiciary's Mediation and Conflict Resolution Office…

  • Health care

    18 Sep 2009 | 8:57 am
    Like most folks, I'm interested in the debate on health care that is going on in this country. Being the good neutral, I'm not going to let you know my preferences.But I got to thinking this morning on the way back from the courthouse: how would I mediate the health care debate?The health care debate has all of the issues relating to a really sophisticated piece of complex litigation: opinions on all sides from authorities in the field and interesting legal issues (the Wall Street Journal has run pieces discussing the constitutionality--rather, unconstitutionality of the federal government…

  • Congratulations

    18 Sep 2009 | 8:57 am
    Congratulations to me and Re:solutions. We just published our 100th post.
 
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    Settle It Now Negotiation Blog

  • Impatience Key to Effective Mediation

    5 Nov 2009 | 11:25 am
    (cartoon generously provided by the brilliant Charles Fincher at LawComix) O.K., I'm MUCH TOO CLOSE to this case but nevertheless intrigued by the following comments in the Recorder's recent article, Judge Puts on the Brakes While Heller Sides Mediate. Judge Dennis Montali has canceled the first hearing on a liquidation plan in the Heller bankruptcy, pending the outcome of mediation talks between former shareholders and creditors. Heller's creditors and at least four groups of shareholders appeared for their first mediation conference on Friday before Judge Randall Newsome for the U.S.

  • Mediation Advocacy: The Power of the Story

    4 Nov 2009 | 9:41 am
    I've been accused of Kumbaya here (ask some of my litigation opponents if you want to check out the truth of that particular canard).  It's true that in addition to position-based competitive negotiation strategy and tactics in my mediation practice, I also facilitate what I believe to be the far more effective interest-based collaborative negotiation model, aimed at creating greater "deal" opportunities and avoiding mediation's bad reputation for splitting the baby in half (heard in the hallway:  "anyone can divide by two"). In addition to encouraging parties to…

  • It's Not You, It's Me-diation: the Dim View from Across the Pond

    4 Nov 2009 | 8:47 am
    Thanks to Diane Levin of The Mediation Channel for passing along Six things I'd Change about Mediation from the U.K.'s Mediator Magazine. At present, if the total number of civil mediations were shared out evenly among accredited mediators, on average, mediators would manage fewer than one mediation a year. Astonishingly, there are now half as many mediators as there are independent barristers in the UK. Even so, training organisations proliferate - and are encouraged to do so - and more mediators are accredited each week. Let's be clear: this is a scandal.  If 3% of trained and…

  • Negotiating Gender, a History: When You Wish Upon a Star

    29 Oct 2009 | 7:59 pm
    From Letters of Note.

  • Negotiating Enforceable Employment Arbitration Agreements

    29 Oct 2009 | 12:19 pm
    Even so luminary a firm as O'Melveny has been smacked down by the courts (here, the Ninth Circuit) when trying to enforce employee arbitration agreements.  California lawyers would therefore be well-advised to read the opinion covered at the California Employment Law Report this week:  Arbitration Agreement Upheld Despite Employee's Argument It Was Not Mutual And Adhesive Here's the clause: I hereby agree to submit to binding arbitration all disputes and claims arising out of the submission of this application. I further agree, in the event that I am hired by the company, that all…
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    DIALOGIC Mediation Services

  • Should I vaccinate my child against pandemic H1N1 Flu?

    dialogicmediation
    6 Nov 2009 | 2:50 pm
    The challenges such a decision pose are compounded in the case of separated or divorced parents who share custody.  “Custody”, in this jurisdiction at least, is construed as authority to make major decisions in four areas of a child’s life: health, religious training, education and extracurricular activities. Nancy Van Tine alerted me to this post by [...]

  • Mediation Outreach

    dialogicmediation
    1 Nov 2009 | 8:26 am
    For all of us who explain how we do mediation in our opening statements to clients, we know that the process is not the best known in the land. It is to be hoped that “Facing Kate”, a new TV series in development by the USA Network may help change that.  Kate is a San Francisco [...]

  • Death Penalty World Map

    dialogicmediation
    1 Nov 2009 | 5:51 am
    (Click here for a big version)

  • ‘Speaking Truth to Power’

    dialogicmediation
    30 Oct 2009 | 6:54 am
    Berrett-Koehler Publishers has a blog devoted to lists, as they say, “on just about everything that matters, by authors who know…”.  Just the other day, the blog drew on the thinking of Ira Chaleff, who works on the other side of Leadership, namely Followership. Chaleff  “believes that part of being a good follower, and a hallmark [...]

  • ‘Bad Dad’ Emerges as Better Dad

    dialogicmediation
    15 Oct 2009 | 7:15 am
    The text below is taken from vol. 1 issue 2 of”Conflict Chronicles” of October 15th, an email newsletter published by the Conflict Resolution Center of the University of North Dakota: Carla and Joel came to mediation to work through their differences as they moved toward divorce.  They met several times to talk about who would have [...]
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    SideTaker.com

  • What Should I Do With Evil Mother-in-law?

    Elisa_24 & Male24male
    4 Nov 2009 | 5:38 am
    Side 1 - Hi all, I'm together with my boyfriend for 4 years now, we live together also. The parents of my boyfriend had a dog and when my boyfriend still li...    Side 2 - Well, you already said why i don't want it. I love you very much but what my family does is their buisness. I understand that it hurts you, and it hur...

  • Stay At Home Mom Who Wants A Five Minute Break

    shanon14 & eddiewa1
    30 Oct 2009 | 3:57 pm
    Side 1 - I am a stay at home mom of two beautiful baby girls. One is 2 1/2 and the other is 16 months. I love my children with all of my heart and I would die...    Side 2 - At the present time my wifes responsiblilities are simple, take care of the kids and keep the house clean. I have no problem with keeping my kids or t...

  • A Place To Sleep

    MGHDS & Angel09
    29 Oct 2009 | 11:22 am
    Side 1 - so i havent had any where to sleep for months i get invited to spend the night somewhere and i have stayed at this place before but i guess it is a bi...    Side 2 - Ok so.. My boyfriend has been going through a rough time lately and i have been trying to do all i can do for him to help him out. I know he needs a p...

  • An Hour Late All The Time?

    tiredofhiscrap & imrighturwrong
    27 Oct 2009 | 4:48 pm
    Side 1 - Ok, so my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years now. Every year around this time he decides to tell me he's on his way over to pick me up and...    Side 2 - well it takes me approximatly 10 min or so to get to my girlfriends house, i texted her that i was on my way at 215 pm and i asked her if she was don...

  • Cheating Husband

    sad_wife & sas_fool
    26 Oct 2009 | 5:56 am
    Side 1 - I have been with my husband since I was 15 years old. He has always cheated on me since I was a young girl and I always kept him because we married a...    Side 2 - I love my wife very much and I don"t know why I do the things that I do to make her sad. I really don"t feel lke I'm doing her wrong when I am doing...
 
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    Playing Well

  • Practice makes perfect

    Deidre Combs
    5 Nov 2009 | 1:46 pm
    What is most essential to Buddhism is based on clarifying the mind. If you want your mind to be clear, it is important to put opinions to rest. If opinions are not stopped, then wrong and right are confused; if the mind is not clear, reality and illusion are mixed up. - Hsueh-yen “Pay [...]

  • Going Mother Bear

    Deidre Combs
    26 Oct 2009 | 8:10 pm
    I remember twenty years ago when our son Cameron was a newborn and my husband and I ventured bravely from the suburbs to downtown Washington, DC on the Metro. He must have been three weeks old or so, as Cameron lay on my shoulder sleeping. A man across the aisle looked at the sleeping baby, [...]

  • Say Yes

    Deidre Combs
    11 Oct 2009 | 8:28 pm
    Life is movement. The more life there is, the more flexibility there is. The more fluid you are, the more you are alive. – Arnaud Desjardins Ask a Buddhist what we can count on and he will probably explain that nothing is permanent or, as Desjardins says, “life is movement.” Sometimes that precept is welcome news. [...]

  • Look for Passion, Passion, Passion

    Deidre Combs
    30 Sep 2009 | 2:02 pm
    Passion burns down every branch of exhaustion. Passion is the supreme elixir and renews all things. No one can grow exhausted when passion is born. Don’t sigh heavily your brow bleak with boredom. Look for passion, passion, passion. — Rumi Our grandfather played eleven different instruments and wrote his high school’s fight song. Yet, somehow musical [...]

  • Keeping it Real

    Deidre Combs
    22 Sep 2009 | 1:06 pm
    I smiled listening to Michael Jordan honor his beloved sister and brothers as some of his valuable opponents when composing last week’s post. I get it; when I wrote The Way of Conflict, I began the introduction by telling the story of how I grew up fighting with my three sisters. These are three of [...]
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    Mediation Channel

  • From the archives: Mediation Channel classics for November

    Diane Levin
    4 Nov 2009 | 10:25 am
    At the start of each month, I highlight some selected posts from prior years. November’s trip in the wayback machine yields these articles: November 2008 To err is human: how do we keep our feet out of our mouths in the first place? Testing for negotiation skills, creativity: an LSAT for the 21st century November 2007 Lawyers, Pakistan and democracy: is it time for a Nobel Prize in law? Myth or fact: are attorneys the best mediators? How to turn a simple misunderstanding into all-out war: a mediator’s advice In weighing the Uniform Mediation Act, Massachusetts mediators may be…

  • A look in the mirror: seeking self-awareness

    Diane Levin
    2 Nov 2009 | 1:13 pm
    Conflict resolution work can be demanding, asking much of those who practice it. Among other qualities, practitioners must ideally bring to the table an openness and curiosity to learn more about how others see and experience the world; respect and compassion; the humility to acknowledge an error and express regret for an unintended outcome; and the willingness to remain alert for their own cognitive errors and biases. These attributes flow from the capacity for self-awareness — a quality that requires eternal vigilance and constant practice. (I cheerfully admit that I’m a slow…

  • Justice for all: battling bias in the courts

    Diane Levin
    2 Nov 2009 | 11:48 am
    Bias does its greatest damage undetected, operating beneath the radar of our awareness or even contrary to our conscious intentions. Bias can be costly, imposing what researchers have described as a “stereotype tax“, affecting everything from negotiating to hiring decisions. Unconscious bias can exclude qualified people from jobs or educational opportunities. Because of biases and assumptions about their counterpart on the other side of the table, negotiators are more likely to leave value on the table. Bias is pervasive. It can be found where it is least welcomed, even in…

  • In search of a better argument

    Diane Levin
    1 Nov 2009 | 10:44 am
    Conflict. There’s certainly plenty of it to go around. Daily life is made up of discord, debate and disagreement. I for one would hate to see conflict vanish. Not only would it put me and all the other mediators out of work, but life would be far less interesting. No doubt quality of life would suffer, since conflict after all famously provokes improvements. (Besides, in a world without argument imagine how erotic love might suffer without make-up sex to spark things up.) What we need is not fewer arguments in the world. It’s not the quantity that’s at issue, it’s the…

  • Public licensing and regulation of mediators: the arguments for and against

    Diane Levin
    18 Oct 2009 | 9:24 am
    One of the issues hotly debated in the ADR field is whether it’s time for state licensing and regulation of the practice of mediation. The following are summaries of the arguments that each side to the debate has marshaled. In the comments below, I’d welcome readers to add arguments that I’ve overlooked. I’m not critiquing the arguments, merely collecting them. The criticism I’ll leave for another day. The arguments in support of state licensing of mediators: State regulation of the practice of mediation would assure the quality of mediation services by…
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    Waging Nonviolence

  • Daily Show pokes fun at boycotts

    Eric Stoner
    6 Nov 2009 | 11:49 am
    The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c Whole Foods Boycott www.thedailyshow.com On The Daily Show last week, there was a funny, but ultimately dismissive and wrong-headed segment on the logic and effectiveness of boycotts. In his comedic way, Wyatt Cenac made the case that liberals shouldn’t stop shopping at Whole Foods simply because, as he describes it,  “the CEO of a company had the audacity to express his personal opinion about health care in writing.” Why not? If the head of any company is doing something that you think is morally wrong or…

  • Who brought down the Berlin Wall?

    Eric Stoner
    6 Nov 2009 | 10:04 am
    With the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall approaching on Monday, a surprisingly thoughtful article in Forbes Magazine of all places looks at who should really take credit for the collapse of the Soviet Union. Konrad Jarausch, a professor of European Civilization at the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill, writes that the idea that Reagan simply spent the Soviets to death, as many Cold Warriors proclaim, is off the mark: As Gorbachev’s memoirs show, this explanation is at best a half-truth. To be sure, the arms race was one of the reasons why the Russian leader…

  • Experiments with truth: 11/5/09

    Eric Stoner
    6 Nov 2009 | 2:59 am
    The Iranian opposition movement resumed mass street protests on Wednesday and faced a violent crackdown by the security forces, as official rallies mark the 30th anniversary of the storming of the US embassy in Tehran. About 14,000 port workers in Peru started a two-day nationwide strike yesterday to protest the government’s privatization push and to pressure it to revoke a recent agreement for the modernization of an important port. Angry Afghan villagers protested Thursday against what they said was the killing of 11 civilians by foreign troops. Thousands of Opel workers have gone on…

  • Chomsky credits the anti-war movement

    Bryan Farrell
    4 Nov 2009 | 3:35 am
    Noam Chomsky gave a talk in London last week in which he explained how protests against the Iraq War actually had a positive effect: “There is a lot of comparison between opposition to the Iraq war with opposition to the Vietnam war, but people tend to forget that at first there was almost no opposition to the Vietnam war,” said Chomsky. “In the Iraq war, there were massive international protests before it officially started… and it had an effect. The United Sates could not use the tactics used in Vietnam: there was no saturation bombing by B52s, so there was no…

  • Experiments with truth: 11/3/09

    Eric Stoner
    3 Nov 2009 | 9:23 am
    In San Diego, three single-payer health care supporters were arrested Monday after protesting outside the Mission Valley office of Blue Shield of California. Three others were arrested at a sit-in yesterday in St. Louis outside of Anthem Blue Cross & Blue Shield as part of the same campaign, organized by Mobilization for Health Care for All. Five peace activists were arrested Monday for entering a naval base in Bangor, Washington as part of a Plowshares action. The activists cut a hole in a fence to access the base. As they walked onto the grounds of the base, they left a trail of blood…
 
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