Conflict Resolution

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    Scotwork Negotiation Blog - Defining Negotiation in the Modern World
    26 Feb 2015 | 4:45 am
    Most of you have followed (to some extent at least) the negotiations between the recently elected Greek government and its European partners. Depending on his or her political persuasion, an observer may feel in a number of ways regarding the outcome. So was the agreement a huge success, or was it a full capitulation of the Greek government?... >
  • A Difficult Conversation with My Husband Turns Into an Unexpected Gift

    Judy Ringer's Ki Moments Blog
    2 Feb 2015 | 9:00 pm
    It was a difficult conversation with my husband, one of many on a theme that had followed us over the course of our 40-year marriage. I had made a statement that I thought reflected appreciation. However, he interpreted it as criticism and became upset. I could immediately see how the statement was misinterpreted and wanted to interrupt and tell him the real meaning and the mistake he'd made in thinking I meant something else.Read more...
  • The Role of Emotional Self Regulation

    Center for Conflict Dynamics
    rundece
    17 Feb 2015 | 10:44 am
    The Role of Emotional Self Regulation by Craig Runde, Director of the Center for Conflict Dynamics Recent research has found that improved emotion regulation can prevent task conflict from turning into relationship conflict.(1) This means that improving self-awareness of your own hot buttons, learning how to delay your responses, and developing ways to cool down [...]
  • Learning from 4 Year-Olds

    Scotwork Negotiation Blog - Defining Negotiation in the Modern World
    12 Feb 2015 | 4:55 am
    A recent TV documentary (The Secret Life of 4 Year Olds) gave a fascinating insight into the way grown-ups work. The film makers fitted out a kindergarten classroom with hidden cameras, and then put a group of 4 year olds into the classroom to interact with each other, under the supervision of two expert teachers, and secretly watched by a group of child psychologists. Having identified some of the personality traits of the children, they were split into two groups and invited to build a pretend house out of cardboard boxes and then decorate it. The groups were pre-selected; one had the more…
  • WCML 043: Sensitive Language Swaps with Katie Benedetto Jones

    Pace Smith
    Pace and Kyeli
    26 Feb 2015 | 5:58 am
    I say, “you kicked ass” and I’m praising while talking of kicking. Amazing how “fight” is polite. So let us rewrite The violence of everyday phrasing. Highlights: a partial list of violent language glitterbomb → glitterfest why is it important to rephrase violent language? a partial list of sensitive language swaps “hang in there” “you guys” Kyeli: The Last Truthbender where to draw the line between self-expression and offending others? cursing Links: The Usual Error the unicornfree post about brands vs. worldviews Katie’s growing…
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    Seattle Divorce Mediation | Whole Mediation | (206) 568-5337

  • Divorce Mediation Can Help During Tax Season

    Debra Synovec
    24 Feb 2015 | 12:30 pm
    Along with the many other difficulties involved in a divorce, tax season can be an especially tricky time. Although taxes are probably the last thing on your mind when divorcing, the issues involved will have an impact on your tax return as well as your spouse’s tax return. Tax rules are complicated enough, and the legalities of divorce can only make them more problematic. Divorce mediation can help alleviate this process by emphasizing communication between the couple and efficiently coming up with solutions to filling out tax returns. “Many couples going through a litigated divorce are…
  • The Divorce Mediator and Attorney Team

    Debra Synovec
    28 Jan 2015 | 12:39 pm
    Video Series Part 3 Divorce: Mediator and Attorney Team from Cimira Studios on Vimeo. A common misconception in divorce mediation is that if you’re using a mediator, you don’t need an attorney; for some couples that may be true. However, often times attorneys/legal advisers play an important and necessary role in the early stage mediated divorce process. While an attorney is the legal advocate for the client, a mediator acts as a neutral guide and facilitator for the divorcing couple. Mediators and attorneys play different but crucial roles in the divorce process. A mediator provides a…
  • Explaining Divorce Mediation

    Debra Synovec
    27 Dec 2014 | 3:54 pm
    Video Series Part 2 Divorce Mediation from Cimira Studios on Vimeo. Divorce is usually an emotional, confusing, and overwhelming time for each person involved. Mediation is a process that provides a safe and productive method for couples to get results, come up with solutions, and avoid messy, expensive courtroom situations. Merriam-Webster dictionary defines “mediation” as “intervention between conflicting parties to promote reconciliation, settlement, or compromise”.  Specifically, a divorce mediator works with the divorcing couple and facilitates healthy conversation between them…
  • Choosing a Divorce Mediator

    Debra Synovec
    25 Nov 2014 | 10:17 am
    Video Series Part 1 Choosing a Divorce Mediator from Cimira Studios on Vimeo. “Divorce is not a battle to be won, it’s a problem to be solved.” Mediation is a valuable method for divorcing couples to make decisions that will keep the acrimony down,  and create solutions that work for both sides. Divorce mediators facilitate healthy discussions in order to help clients solve problems…do you really need a judge to tell you what to do? After all, divorce is a family issue, not a legal issue. Choosing the right mediator is crucial for couples—mediators come from diverse backgrounds,…
  • Knowledge Resources for Divorce Professionals

    Debra Synovec
    28 Oct 2014 | 3:25 am
    Knowledge Resources for Divorce Professionals Lots of learning going on in the fields of mediation and collaborative law.  Last weekend I attended the nation’s largest annual gathering of International Academy of Collaborative Professionals at a conference in beautiful Vancouver B.C.  One week before this I attended the Academy of Professional Family Mediators 2014 Conference  (APFM) in wonderful San Diego, CA. Both brought together hundreds of family and divorce professionals from all over the world for discussions, workshops, forums, sessions and networking events. One thing I would…
 
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    Pace Smith

  • WCML 043: Sensitive Language Swaps with Katie Benedetto Jones

    Pace and Kyeli
    26 Feb 2015 | 5:58 am
    I say, “you kicked ass” and I’m praising while talking of kicking. Amazing how “fight” is polite. So let us rewrite The violence of everyday phrasing. Highlights: a partial list of violent language glitterbomb → glitterfest why is it important to rephrase violent language? a partial list of sensitive language swaps “hang in there” “you guys” Kyeli: The Last Truthbender where to draw the line between self-expression and offending others? cursing Links: The Usual Error the unicornfree post about brands vs. worldviews Katie’s growing…
  • The Little Girl and the Wind

    Pace
    19 Feb 2015 | 5:58 am
    Act I: Hand on the Window There once was a girl so afraid That she never went outside and played. She feared that a breeze Would lift her with ease So, hand on the window, she stayed. For years she went on in this way Keeping her heart locked away. Freedom, belonging She held these with longing Yet stayed inside day after day. Act II: The Call The rays of the sun, warm and bright Called to her heart with their light. One hand on the knob She choked back a sob And stepped out into her delight. Despite the still hush of the weather She wished to hold on to a tether. She worried the wind Would…
  • WCML 042: Life, the universe, and everything

    Pace and Kyeli
    12 Feb 2015 | 5:58 am
    The meaning of life? Here’s a clue: What’s true depends on your worldview. Despite such deep thought, We simply cannot Know the answer… and it’s 42. In this episode, we talk about the meaning of life, the true nature of the universe, and freakishly delicious croissant-doughnut hybrids. Highlights: Douglas Adams and 42 your mom the Ottoman Empire the meaning of life questions vs. answers how to tell true meaning from fake meaning (e.g. conspiracy theory, cults) the ethics of selling meaning the true nature of the universe Kyeli’s story about “All paths lead…
  • My top 100 suggestions for Pathfinders

    Pace
    5 Feb 2015 | 5:58 am
    I went through my files and looked at every single assignment I’ve ever given one of my Pathfinding coaching clients. I found some interesting patterns, a few really funny ones, and many that could help you find your path, too. Here are the top 100. All of these are actual assignments I’ve given to actual clients, with any identifying information removed. Even if the specific details don’t apply to you or your situation, see if there’s something in there that might help you. The 4 most common assignments I see variations on these four assignments in almost every…
  • WCML 041: Beyond Maiden Mother Crone, with Danielle Cornelius

    Pace and Kyeli
    29 Jan 2015 | 5:58 am
    The Maiden, the Mother, the Crone: A triptych that seems set in stone. But Danielle Cornelius Unveils the mysterious; There’s more than just these three alone. A wild ride through the broken systems we live in, balancing our energies and breaking free from limiting boxes! Highlights: Maiden, Mother, Queen, Crone the hormone that makes you want to help everyone a transgender perspective on all this the Enneagram and masculine/feminine energy why do we label these two energies “masculine” and “feminine”? what you can do with all this newfound knowledge about…
 
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    WordPress Tag: Conflict Resolution

  • Operating Systems

    Larina Hintze
    15 Feb 2015 | 12:03 pm
    We all have an ‘operating system’.  Ever notice that when you talk to some people they just “get it”. They understand the vision, the conversation, and how to live in the solution.  What about others? Those with a different operating system.  How do we get our work done, when dealing with others that have a different operating system? When we live in the solution, it can often be a challenge for us to deal with people that live in ‘problems’.  These people are all around us.  They put up road blocks to their own success.   They attempt to block the…
  • Implications of Offensive and Stabilisation Mandates for the Future of UN Peacekeeping

    Cedric de Coning
    15 Feb 2015 | 2:43 am
    The most important issue that the UN High-level Independent Panel on Peace Operations will have to consider and provide guidance on is how far we can stretch UN peacekeeping along the use of force trajectory, before it looses its core ethos and transforms into something else? At what point along this trajectory does the principles of UN peacekeeping – consent, impartiality and limited use of force – loose its relevance? In this context, the UN’s missions in CAR (MINUSCA), the DRC (MONUSCO) and Mali (MINUSMA) reflect a new trend in that that they all have ‘stabilisation’ in…
  • Creative strategies in negotiations, pt. 1

    nakawashi9
    14 Feb 2015 | 5:44 pm
    Dear reader. Good to have you back. This post is about creative strategies and approaches for resolving and settling conflicts. Based on my previous experiences during the Kampala Talks in 2013 and ceasefire negotiations with the Darfur Armed Movements, I have made use of a few approaches that fit to the context for widening the range of options perceived by closed-minded people before they walk out of a negotiation session or even turn to subsequent violence due to the frustrations perceived in a narrowly defined negotiation strategy. And I am not alone in this understanding of creativity in…
  • Nonfiction Friday: "Unbroken Circles for Schools" by Ken Johnson

    Barb Caffrey
    13 Feb 2015 | 5:33 pm
    Apologies for being away so long from Shiny Book Review, folks. To partially compensate for that, I’m starting a new category for reviews called “Nonfiction Friday.” Expect there to be more nonfiction reviews on Friday in the not-so-distant future. Tonight’s review subject is Ken Johnson’s UNBROKEN CIRCLES FOR SCHOOLS: Restoring Schools, One Conflict at a Time. This may sound like an unenticing title, but Mr. Johnson’s book is among the most thought-provoking works I’ve ever read because of his premise. Simply put: the criminal justice system, along…
  • Is the conflict in Ukraine only apparently ceasing?

    gloriamastromauro
    13 Feb 2015 | 1:35 pm
    Eastern Ukraine has been the setting of huge violence, claiming the lives of more than 5,000 people and displaced more than one million, with pro-Russian rebels and forces allied to the government trying to grab more and more territory. Leaders of Ukraine, France, Germany and Russia got together on January 11 and 12 to agree on a ceasefire in Ukraine. Eventually they reached a deal stating that fighting should cease at midnight on Saturday. This was asked by Vladimir Putin as one condition for his signature, and as an extension of the fighting to generate even more bloodshed. A day after the…
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    Seattle Divorce Mediation | Whole Mediation | (206) 568-5337

  • Divorce Mediation Can Help During Tax Season

    Debra Synovec
    24 Feb 2015 | 12:30 pm
    Along with the many other difficulties involved in a divorce, tax season can be an especially tricky time. Although taxes are probably the last thing on your mind when divorcing, the issues involved will have an impact on your tax return as well as your spouse’s tax return. Tax rules are complicated enough, and the legalities of divorce can only make them more problematic. Divorce mediation can help alleviate this process by emphasizing communication between the couple and efficiently coming up with solutions to filling out tax returns. “Many couples going through a litigated divorce are…
  • The Divorce Mediator and Attorney Team

    Debra Synovec
    28 Jan 2015 | 12:39 pm
    Video Series Part 3 Divorce: Mediator and Attorney Team from Cimira Studios on Vimeo. A common misconception in divorce mediation is that if you’re using a mediator, you don’t need an attorney; for some couples that may be true. However, often times attorneys/legal advisers play an important and necessary role in the early stage mediated divorce process. While an attorney is the legal advocate for the client, a mediator acts as a neutral guide and facilitator for the divorcing couple. Mediators and attorneys play different but crucial roles in the divorce process. A mediator provides a…
  • Explaining Divorce Mediation

    Debra Synovec
    27 Dec 2014 | 3:54 pm
    Video Series Part 2 Divorce Mediation from Cimira Studios on Vimeo. Divorce is usually an emotional, confusing, and overwhelming time for each person involved. Mediation is a process that provides a safe and productive method for couples to get results, come up with solutions, and avoid messy, expensive courtroom situations. Merriam-Webster dictionary defines “mediation” as “intervention between conflicting parties to promote reconciliation, settlement, or compromise”.  Specifically, a divorce mediator works with the divorcing couple and facilitates healthy conversation between them…
  • Choosing a Divorce Mediator

    Debra Synovec
    25 Nov 2014 | 10:17 am
    Video Series Part 1 Choosing a Divorce Mediator from Cimira Studios on Vimeo. “Divorce is not a battle to be won, it’s a problem to be solved.” Mediation is a valuable method for divorcing couples to make decisions that will keep the acrimony down,  and create solutions that work for both sides. Divorce mediators facilitate healthy discussions in order to help clients solve problems…do you really need a judge to tell you what to do? After all, divorce is a family issue, not a legal issue. Choosing the right mediator is crucial for couples—mediators come from diverse backgrounds,…
  • Knowledge Resources for Divorce Professionals

    Debra Synovec
    28 Oct 2014 | 3:25 am
    Knowledge Resources for Divorce Professionals Lots of learning going on in the fields of mediation and collaborative law.  Last weekend I attended the nation’s largest annual gathering of International Academy of Collaborative Professionals at a conference in beautiful Vancouver B.C.  One week before this I attended the Academy of Professional Family Mediators 2014 Conference  (APFM) in wonderful San Diego, CA. Both brought together hundreds of family and divorce professionals from all over the world for discussions, workshops, forums, sessions and networking events. One thing I would…
 
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    Nancy Love's Weblog

  • Sorry…

    Dr. Nancy Love
    18 Feb 2015 | 10:14 am
    By now some of you will be able to tell that the SHARP as a Marble post was a repeat of the Making a SHIFT.  I was testing out the new website drnancylove.com  It is live and it is undergoing some adjustments as I figure out how to keep all of you informed and interested and move to the new site without disruption.  The SHARP as a Marble was a test. And it proofed that I am not as SHARP today as I need to be to enter into the underground, mystifying world of the connected, interconnected “inter-web” I have somehow acquired two Facebook pages, three twitter accounts and have…
  • Sharp, Happy, Independent, Fit and Trusting – Making the SHIFT

    Dr. Nancy Love
    13 Feb 2015 | 8:14 am
    Just a brief note today on the importance of measuring your wellbeing from time to time.  How well are you feeling on each of the five intelligence measures? Intellectually are you feeling SHARP?  What is your sense of whether or not your mind is working at capacity today? Emotionally are you feeling HAPPY?  What emotions are you aware of and how light or heavy is your heart today? Relationally are you feeling INDEPENDENT?  What level of control do you sense with your relationships today? Physically are you feeling FIT? What is your sense of your level of health and fitness today?
  • Yesterday was my First Day with Constance

    Dr. Nancy Love
    9 Feb 2015 | 8:24 am
    I am sure you are all familiar with the excitement and frustration associated with setting up a new computer. For me it is always a test of my patience and my translation skills. You need to be able to speak the language of the program you are working with if you hope to successfully bring the new computer to a place where you are comfortable working with it. You have to be Gentle and Honest, especially when you are asking for help. You have to be Open to new ways to doing things and new language for old processes and more steps to achieve the same outcomes. You have to get past the…
  • The Saga of the Lost Computer and Other Things That Take Time Away

    Dr. Nancy Love
    7 Feb 2015 | 7:00 am
    This morning I am writing on a brand new computer.   I had a great one that froze on me way back in September.  I spent hours and hours trying to get it back but it would work for an hour or so and then shut down without warning.  I spent time on-line with tech people and talked to me computer geek brother about it.  It seemed obvious that it had a mechanical flaw.  So the company sent me a box and I sent the box and the computer back on October 3rd.   About three weeks later I got an email thanking me for my business and closing the file.  I objected.  I had not received any notice…
  • A Return to St Thomas

    Dr. Nancy Love
    31 Jan 2015 | 5:19 am
    You will never guess where I am now. I am in Charlotte Amalie at the University of the Virgin Islands on St Thomas. This morning I presented PULSE to the President and his cabinet. The decision was made only ten days ago and yet here I am having given a three hour version of the five day PULSE course. I am going to stay until Sunday and make the trek back through Miami and Toronto. Coming here I was routed through Las Vegas and Newark, New Jersey. Of course the threat of the Blizzard of 2015 created quite a stir as we made contingency plans to make sure I actually made it here. Six cities in…
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    NCDD Community News

  • Lessons from the Jefferson Center’s OH Climate Dialogue

    Roshan Bliss
    26 Feb 2015 | 9:47 am
    We learned from our members at the 2014 NCDD conference that D&D practitioners are looking for ways to help their communities have more conversations on climate change, so we wanted to make sure to share this piece about a process model used by NCDD member organization the Jefferson Center to do just that. Their climate dialogue in Ohio follows up on similar efforts from last year, and offers some key insights on good process for discussing climate change. We encourage you to read their piece below or to find the original by clicking here. Northeast Ohio Dialogue on Water &…
  • $3M Knight Competition Seeks Ideas for Increasing Civic Participation

    Roshan Bliss
    25 Feb 2015 | 6:00 am
    Today, the Knight Foundation begins accepting submissions in a competition for part of a $3 million pot that we know many of our NCDD members could do well in. The Knight News Challenge calls for creative ideas about how to increase civic participation around elections, and we encourage all of our NCDDers to consider applying before the March 19 deadline. You can learn more in the KF blog piece below or by visiting www.newschallenge.org. On Feb. 25 we will open the next Knight News Challenge with this question: How might we better inform voters and increase civic participation before,…
  • On Evaluation and Legitimacy in D&D

    Roshan Bliss
    24 Feb 2015 | 6:00 am
    Our partners at the Kettering Foundation recently published an insightful interview with Prof. Katie Knobloch of the Center for Public Deliberation – an NCDD organizational member – that we wanted to share here. There’s a lot to learn from Katie’s reflection on the challenges of evaluating and legitimizing D&D work, so we encourage you to read the interview below or find the original piece here. Does Our Work Really Matter? Deliberative Practitioners Reflect on the Impact of Their Work As attention to public deliberation has increased, one core interest of…
  • PCP Launches “A Better Question” Series on Hot Topics

    Roshan Bliss
    23 Feb 2015 | 7:25 am
    Recently there has been a lot of talk on our NCDD discussion listserv about how to have good conversations around the current vaccine debate, and so we wanted to share this timely piece from our friends with the Public Conversations Project. PCP is launching a new blog series aimed at helping folks have better conversations on controversial topics called “A Better Question,” and they dealt with vaccinations as their first subject. We encourage you to read their piece below or find the original on the PCP blog by clicking here A Better Question: Vaccinations For the past 25…
  • Update on Pastor-Scientist Dialogue Series from PA

    Roshan Bliss
    20 Feb 2015 | 9:00 am
    We have been watching the development of a fascinating series from the good folks with NCDD member organization Public Agenda wherein they are bringing together evangelical Christians and scientists for dialogue. We’ve shared their latest blog posts on how the dialogues have gone, and we encourage you to read it below or find the original here. Diffusing Tension Through Dialogue – and a Touch of Humor Public Agenda is partnering with AAAS to facilitate a series of dialogues between scientists and evangelical Christian pastors throughout the summer and fall. The purpose of the…
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    Crisis Management by us

  • Anthem’s Apology Hits all Three C’s of Credibility by Jonathan & Erik Bernstein

    Jonathan & Erik Bernstein
    24 Feb 2015 | 9:55 am
    A rare corporate apology done right The Anthem hack, which exposed the personal information of as many as 80 million customers, put the healthcare provider in an ugly situation. Not only were its own computer security team’s credentials stolen and used to access private information, but it was revealed that the data was not encrypted. This left customers more than a little upset, but by showing its understanding of their feelings Anthem in its apologetic email the organization took a big step in the direction of successful crisis management. We constantly catch companies forgetting one…
  • Guest Post: Separating Manufactured Outrage from Real Issues by Jonathan & Erik Bernstein

    Jonathan & Erik Bernstein
    20 Feb 2015 | 9:44 am
    [Editor's note: We welcome another insightful guest post from Issue Outcomes' Tony Jaques as he shares some perspective on the flood of "outrage" we see on a near-daily basis.] Much ado about nothing? Social media has proved a powerful tool for raising legitimate issues onto the public agenda. But it has also facilitated a flood of confected issues and manufactured outrage. Identifying the difference between the two is now an emerging challenge for issue managers and other senior executives. When can you reasonably ignore a confected issue and when might a real issue slip under the radar and…
  • Comcast’s Crisis Management for Name-Calling on Bills by Jonathan & Erik Bernstein

    Jonathan & Erik Bernstein
    14 Feb 2015 | 5:30 am
    Or rather, lack thereof Comcast, already one of the most hated companies in the world, drew yet more (well-deserved) vitriol early this month after it was revealed that customers were having the names on their accounts changed to things like “a-hole”, “whore”, “dummy”, and “super bitch”, most likely by angry phone reps. The first of these incidents came to light in late January on the blog of consumer report Chris Elliott, and here’s Comcast’s response: It’s a privilege to have customers use our products and to have them invite us…
  • Dating App Vulnerabilities Pose a Crisis Management Risk by Jonathan & Erik Bernstein

    Jonathan & Erik Bernstein
    12 Feb 2015 | 5:40 am
    Popular phone apps make an ideal target for data-hungry hackers Apps of all kinds fill just about every smartphone these days, making the most popular ones ideal targets for hackers. Dating apps may be among the most widely used, making them a perfect target as a recent IBM study discovered. Reuters reports: The millions of people using dating apps on company smartphones could be exposing themselves and their employers to hacking, spying and theft, according to a study by International Business Machines Corp. IBM security researchers said 26 of 41 dating apps they analyzed on Google…
  • Crisis Management Lesson: You Are Always on Camera by Jonathan & Erik Bernstein

    Jonathan & Erik Bernstein
    31 Jan 2015 | 7:44 am
    Learning from the case of the delivery driver and the auto dealership These days, it’s pretty safe to assume you’re always on camera. Whether it’s a cell phone, spy cams that can appear to be just about anything, or, as in this case, a plain old security camera, someone’s watching. When pizza delivery guy Jarrid Tansey delivered $42 worth of pizza to a car dealership in Westport, Massachusetts, he assumed the $50 he was handed included his tip and headed back to run another route. Employees at the car dealership evidently felt no tip was deserved, though, and called to…
 
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    Hesketh Mediation

  • Police penalised for not mediating

    Philip Hesketh
    27 Feb 2015 | 1:30 am
    The latest in a lengthening list of cases where parties have suffered a costs penalty for failing to mediate saw the Metropolitan Police lose one third of their costs in a claim which they successfully defended at court. In Laporte and Christian v The Commissioner of Police for the Metropolis 2015 the claimant lost a claim against the police but argued there should be no order for costs as the defendant refused to engage in ADR and specifically failed to accept offers to mediate the dispute. This case is another example of the court systematically looking at the “Halsey reasons”…
  • How to make a compelling offer of mediation

    Philip Hesketh
    26 Feb 2015 | 8:01 am
    Just a few years ago many people thought making an offer to mediate a contested probate dispute was a sign of weakness, that you did not have confidence to go to trial. With the recent cases on costs sanctions for failing to engage in mediation such as PGF II SA v OMFS Company 2013 and most recently Laporte and Christian v The Commissioner of Police for the Metropolis and the growing appreciation of the benefits of mediated settlements very few litigators still hold this view although it may still be prevalent amongst executors and beneficiaries. Rather than offer a template mediation offer…
  • Which contested probate claims are suitable for mediation?

    Philip Hesketh
    10 Feb 2015 | 8:10 am
    Welcome to the first in a series of posts guiding people involved in contested wills and probate disputes through the mediation process to help you decide if mediation can help you or your client in any particular case. For those unfamiliar with mediation it is a process where a trained independent mediator helps you and your opponent try to find a solution, usually but not always by spending half a day or longer in meetings with both sides. It has some advantages over preparing for a trial mainly: it is much quicker; you can save enormous amounts in legal costs; the parties retain control of…
  • When is the right time to mediate?

    Philip Hesketh
    26 Nov 2014 | 5:05 am
    I once mediated a case just one day before the matter was listed for trial. That’s as late in the proceedings as I have ever mediated (although you can get later, some mediations take place between final hearing and appeal). On the other hand I have mediated plenty of cases before proceedings have been issued. So, is there an ideal time to mediate? Carol Park-Conroy, writing recently for JAMS Global Construction Solutions Newsletter, suggested the right time to mediate is when the individuals with settlement authority have “decision-quality information” which she defined as…
  • Shooting the messenger – delivering offers at mediation

    Philip Hesketh
    14 Nov 2014 | 8:22 am
    How do you deliver offers at a mediation? I guess most people would answer that they tell the mediator what the offer is and ask him/her to tootle down the corridor and deliver it to the other side in their private room. The mediator might ask you to write the offer out so that there can be no mistake in what gets delivered. Although that is the typical process I think parties who don’t personally deliver offers to the other side risk missing out on important information that people often give, wittingly or otherwise, when they receive an offer. Seeing how the people in a room react to…
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    Judy Ringer's Ki Moments Blog

  • Difficult Conversations: Getting Started

    16 Feb 2015 | 9:00 pm
    Is there a conversation you've been putting off? Is there a coworker or family member with whom you need to talk - but don't? Maybe you've tried and it didn't turn out as you had hoped. Or maybe you fear that talking will only make things worse. Whatever the reason, you feel stuck and you'd like to free up that energy for more useful purposes. One of the most common reasons I hear in my workshops for not holding difficult conversations is that people don't know how to begin.Read more...
  • A Difficult Conversation with My Husband Turns Into an Unexpected Gift

    2 Feb 2015 | 9:00 pm
    It was a difficult conversation with my husband, one of many on a theme that had followed us over the course of our 40-year marriage. I had made a statement that I thought reflected appreciation. However, he interpreted it as criticism and became upset. I could immediately see how the statement was misinterpreted and wanted to interrupt and tell him the real meaning and the mistake he'd made in thinking I meant something else.Read more...
  • Power & Love: What Would MLK Do?

    19 Jan 2015 | 9:01 pm
    "Power properly understood is nothing but the ability to achieve purpose. It is the strength required to bring about social, political, and economic change.... And one of the great problems of history is that the concepts of love and power have usually been contrasted as opposites, polar opposites, so that love is identified with the resignation of power, and power with the denial of love.... Now we've got to get this thing right. What [we need to realize is] that power without love is reckless and abusive, and love withought power is sentimental and anemic.... It…
  • Keeping it on the Road

    5 Jan 2015 | 9:00 pm
    I've always loved the Chinese proverb: "Unless we change our direction, we are likely to end up where we are headed." What direction are you headed?   At this time of year in particular I tend to think about my direction, whether it's purposeful, and what obstacles might derail me. Although Carrol Suzuki and I have not met, I subscribe to her blog. Her brief, cogent meditation on effective listening is a wonderful practice and a timely reminder on how to keep myself from veering off the path of peace, presence, and positive intention. Carrol gave me permission…
  • Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

    22 Dec 2014 | 9:06 pm
    Wishing you and your loved ones a very happy and peaceful holiday season. Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening ~ by Robert Frost Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village though; He will not see me stopping here To watch his woods fill up with snow. Read more...
 
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    Center for Conflict Dynamics

  • The Role of Emotional Self Regulation

    rundece
    17 Feb 2015 | 10:44 am
    The Role of Emotional Self Regulation by Craig Runde, Director of the Center for Conflict Dynamics Recent research has found that improved emotion regulation can prevent task conflict from turning into relationship conflict.(1) This means that improving self-awareness of your own hot buttons, learning how to delay your responses, and developing ways to cool down [...]
  • Take a Personal Time Out

    rundece
    17 Feb 2015 | 10:16 am
    Take a Personal Time Out by Craig Runde, Director of the Center for Conflict Dynamics   One of the passive constructive behaviors measured by the Conflict Dynamics Profile is called Delay Responding. In the CDP context Delay Responding is described as responding to conflict by waiting things out, letting things settle down, or taking a [...]
  • Retaliation leads to Escalation

    rundece
    6 Feb 2015 | 8:00 am
    Retaliation leads to Escalation by Craig Runde, Director of the Center for Conflict Dynamics Conflict escalates because of how someone perceives and responds to your behavior. Controlling your behavior and consciously choosing your response can help you disrupt what the Mediation Training Institute (MTI) refers to as the Retaliatory Cycle. In this article we’ll look [...]
  • Learning How to Reach Out

    rundece
    15 Jan 2015 | 12:17 pm
    Learning How to Reach Out by Craig Runde, Director of the Center for Conflict Dynamics   One of the active constructive behaviors measured by the Conflict Dynamics Profile (CDP) instrument is called Reaching Out. It is described as responding to conflict by reaching out to the other person, making the first move, and trying to [...]
  • What gets you hot under the collar?

    rundece
    1 Jan 2015 | 12:04 pm
    What gets you hot under the collar? by Craig Runde, Director of the Center for Conflict Dynamics If you have ever had a co-worker or partner that aggravated you to the point where you initiated a conflict, then you have experienced your Hot Button. The Conflict Dynamics Profile (CDP) assessment measures these triggering events that [...]
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    Scotwork Negotiation Blog - Defining Negotiation in the Modern World

  • It's All About Packaging!

    26 Feb 2015 | 4:45 am
    Most of you have followed (to some extent at least) the negotiations between the recently elected Greek government and its European partners. Depending on his or her political persuasion, an observer may feel in a number of ways regarding the outcome. So was the agreement a huge success, or was it a full capitulation of the Greek government?... >
  • Key Errors in the Greek Negotiating Strategy

    18 Feb 2015 | 4:45 am
    As these lines are written, the negotiations between the Greek government and its Eurogroup partners are still under way. As the end result is not yet known (and probably will not be for some days) some mistakes of the Greek handling of the situation are already discernible. Here are three obvious mistakes I have selected to discuss in this article...>
  • Learning from 4 Year-Olds

    12 Feb 2015 | 4:55 am
    A recent TV documentary (The Secret Life of 4 Year Olds) gave a fascinating insight into the way grown-ups work. The film makers fitted out a kindergarten classroom with hidden cameras, and then put a group of 4 year olds into the classroom to interact with each other, under the supervision of two expert teachers, and secretly watched by a group of child psychologists. Having identified some of the personality traits of the children, they were split into two groups and invited to build a pretend house out of cardboard boxes and then decorate it. The groups were pre-selected; one had the more…
  • Get Mad Back

    5 Feb 2015 | 4:45 am
    Get mad back? Not so sure. Couple of things have passed my desk this week that have prompted this blog. The first is something that happened to me on one of our Advancing Negotiation Skills courses. One of the participants was asking about how to deal with difficult people. I suspect we have all come across them in our lives be it work or personal. As usual to give myself time to ponder and consider a response, a kind of adjournment, I asked the rest of the group if they had any ideas... >
  • The Precedent

    29 Jan 2015 | 4:45 am
    Well, the Greeks have finally gone and done it. At the weekend, they kicked out the conservative New Democracy party – the dominant force in the coalition led by the outgoing prime minister Antonis Samaras and instead voted in Alexis Tsipras’s radical left Syriza party. The rest of Europe has looked on askance; Greece has muscled her way onto the front pages of just about every serious newspaper in Europe; bankers and leaders Europe-wide have been keeping the Andrex puppy busy ever since the news came out...>
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    The Red Velvet Lawyer

  • More Approaches to Setting Goals

    25 Feb 2015 | 3:07 am
    Making Higher Aspirations a Part of Your LifeIn December, I shared a goal setting strategy focused on picking one (or three) words for the year. Yesterday, I ran across this collection of other goal setting strategies
  • The "Sunday Summit"

    24 Feb 2015 | 4:43 am
    Tracking Gains, Setting Weekly Goals, and Holding Yourself AccountableYesterday, I described my productive use of three snow days and the "satisfaction of completion."  Today, I want to describe a tool my business coach, Christine Kane, advised me to use in her UpLevel Your Life on-line coaching program.She calls the tool the "Sunday Summit" because she encourages you to use it once a week to plan your intention for the week.  I have used it every week for three years.The 2-page tool consists of eight questions.  The questions on page one help you focus on gains made the last…
  • Productively Using my Snow Days

    23 Feb 2015 | 2:53 am
    The Satisfaction of CompletionThis last week, the Dean declared three snow days.  I feel like a kid when that happens.  Yes, I did play in the snow a bit.  But, mostly, I enjoyed what my business coach, Christine Kane, calls the "satisfaction of completion."On Sunday and Monday, I completed my tax returns for 2013 and 2014, and I plan to use the refunds to pay off most of my debt. Ka-ching!On Thursday, I began writing the minutes for the Admissions Committee on which I serve. Last night, I completed the first drafts.  Those two big projects had been hanging over my…
  • Law Grad Salaries Exceed Median Household Income

    17 Feb 2015 | 4:21 am
    Still a Good Option If You Can Get  a Bargain on Legal EducationFor the full story, see here.
  • Getting to Yes with Yourself and Other Worthy Opponents

    16 Feb 2015 | 7:26 am
    How is Your Own Stuff Affecting the Negotiation?Bill Ury has published a new book: Getting to Yes with Yourself and Other Worthy Opponents.  I've not read it yet.  But, as the big storm of 2015 began dropping snowflakes on Grundy, I watched an hour-long video featuring Ury at a Google-sponsored event during which he describes the book, tells several stories as examples, and engages the audience in a discussion and a role-play.First,  I do love the "getting" series of books.  I've read them all.  I have assigned Getting to Yes to all my students over the…
 
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